One thing I discovered this weekend: when one grows up as a Literature & History Nerd, as opposed to, say, a Science & Math Nerd, one has vastly fewer Posterboard Display Opportunities, and that can lead to tragic Posterboard Displays in adulthood, should one have the opportunity to present, say, an informational table on food storage “lifestyle” ideas at a multi-congregational preparedness fair.
Also, since I was actually voted Least School Spirit in high school, and never was a cheerleader, nor drew “Spirit Posters”, nor banners, nor car wash signs, I apparently missed key educational points related to “How To Draw Nicely With Fat Markers.”
So, my “circle” on my lovely tri-fold posterboard display thingy was rather more shaped like a directionally-noted kidney bean. And my outline-the-glued-down-printout-words lines were very, very sad.
I briefly considered telling one and all that my little girls had helped with the posterboard, and wasn’t that just the cutest effort ever??
But then I realized: I’m doing this for church. Lying? Maybe not so high on the “good ideas” list.
I chose to distract the viewing public from potential criticism of my Posterboard Display Skills with chocolate cake.
Or else, they’re just mocking me behind my back tonight, or sharing piteous sighs over that poor, poor fat girl who has no marker skills. Pooooor thing.
(I need to note one thing: you other ladies need to stop sneaking weird things into chocolate cake, and trying to fob them off on your menfolk. I had more fellows today, when offered a piece of chocolate cake, interrogate me as to what “sneaky” item might be mooshed, blended, or otherwise masked by the idea of cake. Zucchini, maybe I can understand. But MAYONNAISE? Black beans? REALLY, PEOPLE? Home-made cake is practically health food, anyway. Just make it normal and eat the freaking caking.)
Long, sad crafting failure story made much, much shorter: I put together an informational booth for a multi-congregational preparedness fair today, and chatted with loads of really nice people about how having a fully-stocked pantry of three to six months of full meals in our homes (using a mix of pantry staples, commercial prepared, home bottled, and home frozen foods) can change our attitude toward being prepared for “stormy days,” and significantly stretch our financial and time budgets, leading to a better quality of life in general.
In super-short: Food Storage Is Awesome, It Can Change Your Life, and You Should Do It.
But since I’m rarely short-winded about anything, here’s the 12-page PDF of handouts I did up to go with the informational table, and the cake.
(Don’t tempt ugly karmic retribution by being a jerk about sharing my work. Feel free to share it with friends and family and total strangers, but don’t charge for it, don’t claim it as your own work, please link back to me if you want to share it on-line, keep my copyright intact, and be nice to everyone you meet. Life is so much nicer that way.)